I am Back . . .

Writing a blog after a long time. It is not a mammoth task yet it is not as simple. Finding something, that something which has made you think and that too kept you busy for a long time in thinking, really needs a close observing eye. Past few days of my life resemble a roller coaster ride, each bringing on something new and hence I added some more experiences. But whether I learned from them or not is the question which is bothering me.

Let's begin with what were those experiences? Personal or professional, both the aspects I keep open for all as I think they should not be kept separate. Last week was the time when I saw people separating (not in negative sense) for the sake of good in my personal life. I heard noises like please don't let me go, I am afraid of loneliness. On the contrary those in authority said there is no other option for you and you have to leave and live your life happily. At that time what will be the decision - either to follow the inner voice or the directions given by the people in authority. If both are same, then it is OK, otherwise . . . do I need to write? Also I realised that there is a huge difference between "what happened" and "how are you?." Amazed! I felt that people ask "what happened" only when they sense that it is there responsibilty to know what happened to a person who is cheerful and happy most of the times and at only few moments he / she is silent. "How are you?" though is a very common question which is even asked to the strangers. But have you realised the importance of this such a simple question. Let me give you a single example - You are tired because of some efforts that you have done and not yet disclosed and as a result of fatigue you are silent. It is not that you are sad or something, it is something which most of us experiences. And then in moments of that quietude, how do you feel when someone asks "what happened." Yes at that time the responsibilty is over and you are left with a feeling of disgust. And then someone else comes to ask, "how are you?", you feel like talking, you feel like sharing, you feel like someone is there to listen, you feel like there is someone to comfort you. Again the status is either of repulsion or attraction.

You know once I was asked by someone what kind of person do you like - at that time I gave one of the most common replies that one should be honest. Later on with my pondering mind, I got not the fittest but yes an answer that may arise a feeling in you. The answer was - "Such people are likeable who ask 'how are you?'." This can be explained with an extremely excellent example to which I reached in my dreams. The example is about a woman in labour room just about to deliver a baby. She delivers a healthy baby and the baby is now in the hands of the relatives. Everybody is looking at the baby, playing with him / her. At this point think of the wife and the husband . The wife is tired, she can look the baby but can not feel its smoothness, can not touch its body. What she can do is looking and staring at the activities going on around her. Now think of the husband, if he enjoys with the family without even asking his wife how is she doing . . . just think of the wife's mental state. Instead if the husband leaves everyone aside and goes to his wife to ask "how are you?", think how the wife will feel. After such an example do I need to tell what kind of person do you like? No doubts the unanimous selection will be the husband who asks "how are you?."

Finally, what I learned from such beautiful musings is that now I believe in asking "how are you?" instead of "what happened." I feel that's the best way of showing affection, to show that YOU CARE!